Why We Road Rage (Thank the Survival-based Mindset)

Driving is an activity that leans heavily on the Survival-Based Mindset. Not only does driving involve physical danger, but it demands physical coordination, rapid sensory processing, and instinctive reactions. All traits which come naturally to the Survival-based mindset. In this mindset, we operate on habit and reflex, not deep thought. That’s why it’s so easy to miss an exit when we are driving our non-typical route. We were on automatic, our subconscious was in control.

Although driving often naturally triggers a Survival-based mindset, I like to think that I shift away from that mindset into a more Balanced mindset when I drive. I stay alert, responsive, and physically engaged. But that doesn’t mean I’m immune to the emotional triggers of a Survival-based mindset.

⚠️ Survival-Based Reflexes and Emotional Reactions

One downside of the Survival-Based Mindset is its defensiveness. It protects us from mental or physical threats through quick physical/verbal action but can cause us to overreact. When someone cuts us off or puts us in danger, our fight-or-flight reflex kicks in. We slam the brakes, swerve, react. Adrenaline surges. And sometimes, that surge turns into anger.

Interestingly, I don’t get angry at drivers who make honest mistakes. I feel empathy for them. (Since empathy is not generally associated with the Survival-based mindset, that is why I think I am in a Balanced Mindset). But when someone overreacts to my mistake—laying on the horn, gesturing aggressively—I feel something deeper.  And suddenly, they become a stand-in for every person in my life who’s lacked empathy toward others.

That’s my trigger: perceived injustice, especially when someone seems to lack empathy. That implies I may be leaning towards a Knowledge-based mindset prior to being triggered into a Survival-based Mindset.

🧠 The Empathy Paradox

This pattern goes way back. In elementary school, I used to “fight” bullies—not just physically, but emotionally. I couldn’t stand the lack of empathy. And now I see the irony: when someone triggers my Survival-Based Mindset through their lack of empathy toward others, I lose empathy for them in return.

Does that make me like them?

It reminds me of the saying, “It’s okay to hate the haters.” But maybe it’s not. Because if they’re acting from a Survival-Based Mindset, they’re not villains—they’re just human who had their Survival-based Mindset triggered. I don’t know what triggered them. Maybe the bullies at school were bullied at home. Maybe the driver who honks at me is running late for something important.

I used to think that “giving excuses” for others’ poor behavior made me a pushover. But maybe it just means I’m emotionally intelligent.




🔄 Reframing the Moment

Moving forward, I’ll try to remind myself:
That person isn’t cruel. They’re just expressing their Survival-Based Mindset.
They’re not a villain. They’re human.

💬 Let’s Reflect Together

Reader: What are your emotional triggers that push you into a Survival-Based Mindset and make empathy harder to access?



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