Mindset in Motion

We often think of mindsets as temporary states—ways of thinking that shift based on emotion or circumstance. But what if each mindset carries its own identity ? What if, in the moment of reaction, we’re not just feeling differently—we’re becoming someone else? The Theory of Mindsets already shows how emotional safety shapes behavior. But beneath that, there’s a deeper truth: And when we shift mindsets, we shift identity—even if just for a moment. 🔹 Survival-Based Mindset: The Protector In this mindset, we become the defender, the outsider, the one who must stay safe. We might say things like: “I can’t trust anyone.” “I have to handle this alone.” The self-concept here is reactive, guarded, and often misunderstood. 🔹 Knowledge-Based Mindset: The Observer Here, we become the analyst, the seeker, the one who must understand. We might say: “I need to figure this out.” “Let me think before I respond.” This identity is curious, detached, sometimes superior—but emotionally...

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on how emotions—and therefore mindsets—can be triggered by experiences that aren’t real in the physical sense. Stories, dreams, movies, daydreams… they may be fictional, but the feelings they evoke are anything but. Take that animated movie—you know the one. It opens with a couple who met as children and spent their lives together. She couldn’t have kids, and when she passed, the old man was left completely alone. I’ve seen it multiple times, and I cry every time. It makes me think of me and my own husband, and our future. That sadness pulls me into a Knowledge-Based Mindset. I reflect. I imagine. I feel. Then there are the scary books—the ones that made me practically sprint from the bathroom to the bedroom at night, keeping the light on until morning. Was I being logical? Not at all. My Survival-Based Mindset had kicked in, responding to imagined danger as if it were real. And just last week, I heard my husband and oldest child scream from the other room....

Emotional Safety and the Shifting Mindset I recently spent time with someone I hadn’t seen in over a year. The long absence wasn’t accidental—it was necessary. I needed time to shift my mindset. I needed to feel safe before I could expose myself to that relationship again. The previous visit hadn’t gone well. I won’t get into the details, but I left feeling picked on. My initial response was emotional but reflective—I was in a Balanced Mindset, trying to understand what had happened but was not emotionally unattached. I cried, wondering why this dynamic felt so different from every other relationship in my life. But once I got home, the delayed reaction hit. I was feeling safe enough for a Knowledge-Based mindset and a more objective reflection on events. I realized I had actually been treated unfairly. That insight triggered anger and a strong Survival-Based Mindset. I sent brutally honest texts, calling out their behavior. I didn’t care if I ever saw them again. Good riddance. Th...

Where emotional intelligence meets practical psychology—and self-awareness becomes a daily practice. For decades, I’ve studied human behavior—not just through books and theories, but through lived experience and the quiet observations that come from being deeply curious about people. I’ve asked questions like: Why do we react the way we do? Why do some patterns repeat, even when we want change? And how can we understand ourselves without judgment, but with clarity? This blog is an extension of that journey. It’s a space for exploring the Theory of Mindsets (TOM) —a framework I developed to help decode behavior, improve communication, and foster emotional resilience as described in the book  Predicting Human Behavior. Whether you’re navigating relationships, parenting, leadership, or your own inner world, my goal is to offer tools that are both accessible and emotionally resonant. Here, you’ll find: ✍️ Reflections on mindset theory and emotional intelligence 📘 Companion re...